Monday, November 7, 2011


I don’t want to do this any more. I want to be where I need to be and not diet any more. I am tired of this. I’m tired of the special groceries, the special meals, the questions of how much longer are you doing this, the …. well I don’t know what else right now. Oh how about that scale and it hating me.

I want to exercise my brains out (I am loving exercise) and eat normal thought out meals and not worry about it all. I want to say yes I’d love to go out to dinner and know that I won’t over eat. I want to eat a piece of candy if I want it and not feel like I’m depriving myself because ones not enough. I want to feel good in a t-shrit, swim suit (though I will always be lumpy but don’t need frumpy) and my jeans.

I’m in a funk and I know a lot of it is what’s going on and some things I can’t do anything about but deal with them as they happen but I’m also feeling dumpy, grumpy and just down right ugly. It is amazing how one week you can feel awesome and not even loss a pound and then next week feel so yucky.

I need someone to pump sunshine up my butt and make me smile. Something funny, something meaningful, anything?

I hope your all doing great. I hope sunshine is shining around you and that life is good. By the way, life is good here…stressful but that’s almost everywhere for everyone, it’s just me.

You can ignore me too because I know that this funk isn’t going to last and I know that I will kick this diet in the butt and lose the last of this weight I’m carrying. Just not today…tomorrow maybe.

Sleep well my friends, blessings!!!


Michele said...

When I am feeling down, I always look for something funny that makes me laugh outloud: I always loved Gilda Radner from Sat.Night Live. She passed away from ovarian cancer years ago, but there are many videos online. Here are a couple of my favs:

I found a few other inspirational stories:

When I am down I look for inspiration. You inspire me, Julie. You have come so far. This is for life. Our lives. My feeling is that our weight loss journey must mirror the next stage, maintaining. Simple. But, hard, too. We can not ever freely eat those goodies. A little here and there, but that is it. This is for life. Your friend, michele

Mom to the Fourth Power said...

I agree with Michele on both counts. Laughing does wonders! It may sound cruel but I love watching older people fall down on America's Funniest Home Videos. They look so funny as they fall. No matter what my mood, it seems that something on that show will invariably get me laughing.

Someone once told me when I'm feeling overwhelmed to take whatever it is that is bothering me and imagine it in an overly ridiculous way... and that makes me realize how insignificant my worry or problem really is.

I agree with Michele that you ARE an inspiration and a strong woman. You are amazing with all that you do. So yes, you are going to have your funks once in a while. The enemy of us all gets to us now and then. But you will overcome and see sunshine and a wonderful day ahead of you soon.

Blessings to you...

Princess Dieter said...

It is a funk, and it will pass. The truth is, you need to look at yourself and love how you look now. Be happy with your progress, NOW. And everything else is good and a bonus. Special and powerful, but not necessary. The truth is that you are NOT obese anymore, are active, have altered your body.

You have to just decide, every day, today I will do X and y or I will do a and b. Know that you always have a choice. ALWAYS. It's not a trap or a box. Every day YOU set the boundaries you live with. You ahve the power.

If you want a smaller size, you have to accept the limitations. If you can live at your weight NOW, you know how to maintain it. It's always easier to get heavy.

But you know all that and you know funks pass. And you'll get your new wind and fire.

Just hang on till the better mood comes.. :D

Maren said...

I don't think you should ever feel ugly. I find that you are absolutely beautiful. :)

It's hard when our mind is working against us, but the fact is - you are doing all these great things and making changes in your life! YOU are doing it, and if you just keep making good choices, you will get to wherever you want to go.

I think it's important to just accept that sometimes we will feel like in a funk, and that's okay. Change is hard. It takes time.

Keep in mind how much support you offer to others in the same situation, and give yourself that support too! It's okay, you will get there!

Kalei's Best Friend said...

Julie: Don't think of this as torture.. Think of it as your life depends on it... Eating right will prolong your life... I think I told you when you started this, that you have to take this 'diet' as a way of life. I use to eat a lot of red meat, now I barely eat it... My taste have changed.. I think your body is so use to the carbs and processed foods because society seems to push it. The old adage "you are what you eat" says it all believe in that and that is what will take over... You really don't have to measure your foods out or be so strict in what you eat... You are too hard on yourself.. Every once in a while it is ok to have a cookie.. Its all about PORTION CONTROL... You exercise way more than I do, exercise because YOU want to and not because of the end result... Do it because you love the feeling.

Caron said...

Hang in there Julie. We all get tired of the same old, same old but in the end (at least for me) it is totally worth it. Have a great day!

The Ninja said...

I thought this might help, some of that sunshine you asked for.

I feel frumpy a lot too, I totally understand where you are coming from, it's hard to break out of that funk.

Baby Sister said...

Everyone has down days. You're totally allotted one every once in a while. And that's okay. Just be sure to not be too hard on yourself and take care of yourself. It won't do you any good to keep fighting and trying if you're not good mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, etc. *hugs*

Of One Heart said...

H-e-l-l-o! Umm hmm. What can I say? I hope the freaking madness in all of our lives passes quick. Julie, brighten up. You're beautiful to your Daddy, to Jim, to Mike, to your Mum and Grandma and most importantly (ahem!) to me! As bonus, you have a beautiful heart for which we love you.

Lots of love,


S said...

I also truly believe that this won't always feel like you (we) are following a diet or workout schedule. It'll just all be a part of our lives, our everyday. Taste buds will crave less of the unhealthy stuff and our body will be compelled to move each day. And then it isn't something you (we) have to be aware of or worry about. Because I heartily agree, it's no fun to feel like depriving oneself is the path to a fulfilling life. But it takes time to integrate all these new practices. You're on your way. :-)