Saturday, March 28, 2015

But it’s so hard to except it at times….


    People come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.  Embrace all equally!

I miss my best friend of over 25 years but life changes and people move on for whatever reason, even when they only live 2 miles away. Just have to remember to let the Lord handle it and keep her safe.

Hope you all have an amazing weekend. My will be busy with home and family.


Wednesday, March 25, 2015

While there’s time…..

Good morning to all my friends. It’s hump day, yeah!!! My school has spring break next week. That means we will have 10 days off including the weekends. Another YEAH!!! So many things that need to be done and just maybe I can get some of the done. Between two households and spring I am finding there’s lots.

So with that I have decided that it’s time to take time for me. It’s only little steps and small bits of time but it’s something.

I have gone back to tracking my food and instead of the 10,000 steps that we are suppose to get I’m getting in 5000 or more. Heck I’ve done this before I know the rules to really get into a healthy lifestyle but for me, small bits.

I started on Saturday the 21st. Reasonable/healthy eating over the weekend and really got into it on Monday. I fasted on Monday, yesterday fasted 3/4 of the day and had a healthy dinner, today I fixed myself 3oz steak chunk and 2 farm fresh scrambled eggs with cheese and sweet peppers and am thinking will fast the rest of the day. The reasoning I have for the fasting is I am such an over eater that I need to shrink my stomach a bit so a real size portion will be filling. Will it work, I’m hoping and so far the scale is in agreement.

At the same time of taking care of the physical me, I’m working on the Christian me. Devotion reading in the morning and working on quiet time. Meditation doesn’t work for me…at least not yet but quiet time I can do. I head to work in the afternoon 15 minutes early so that I can just sit and be for a little bit.

All of this is just bits but it’s bits I haven’t taken for me in quite some time and I need them.

I am spending lots of time helping my parents but it seems we have come to a routine that is working, for now. Daddy has made another step in his Alzheimer's and though it’s not good we know worse is coming so learning to deal and do as we go. Mama’s memory from her stoke has returned some, I don’t think it’ll ever be what it was. But we are working with this too. So far they can do 80% of their physical life stuff and 20% of the mental part but that’s 100% they are trying. And I am learning to run two households and both Jim and Mike have been amazing about the time I can’t be here. It’s working.

I want you all to know how much I appreciate you and your awesome comments and emails. Some days it’s just the perfect support I need to make it through it all.  THANK YOU!!!

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Sad and frustrated……But…….

Mama had a stroke. Daddy is getting into the crabby stage. Bills are pilling up here and there but there’s just not enough money for both households. My sewer is backed up in my basement, septic is frozen. I can’t even pee in my own toilet. Got a new GPS, I hate it, like my old one…I could understand that one. Cleaned my car out to sell it, the sales man was such a yuck and a liar I walked away from him. Still need something a bit bigger because my Envoy is too small for daddy to get in and out of without hurting. It’s damp and chilly after the Lord blessed us with 2 days of 70 and sunshine. The dishwasher has partly washed dishes in it. The sinks and toilet have signs on the “NO!!!”. My living room rug needs shampooing, the house needs cleaning, the sheets need washing. I could be a crab, I could be crying, I could be depressed


Life could be so much worse. I just read the news and what I have going on here is a piece of cake compared to the life others have. Someone shoot someone, a hurricane destroying a village and hospital, someone has advance cancer, someone just lost someone. The list is longer than mine and even though I cry myself to sleep a couple times a month, even though I know I need new shoes and daddy needs a new light weight jacket and the septic needs attention and ……. well it could be worse. I have shoes, I found an older jacket in my closet that will fit daddy, the septic will thaw in …well a couple of months and there is a toilet in the garage and the shower is plumbed outside so that means dishes and undies can be taken care of and bodies as well. There’s plenty of groceries in both houses to feed us and there’s gas in my car to take us to the doctors and specialists and even to the DQ for the free ice-cream cones Monday. Life is good. I have to remember that and not bother complaining because it really could be worse. My hands are full but the Lord must think I can handle more so I do.

I have a friend that lost her daddy last week, I didn’t make it to the funeral because was needed else where’s but we are going to meet and have dinner out. I sold eggs today, my chickens are finally laying again. We can eat out and enjoy the company and express the sadness we feel for losing her daddy. I have my daddy, at least parts of him and even though he’s getting crabby easier I’m sure it’s the frustration trying to tell us what’s what and do his job of taking care of us. He hates having me zip him up, find his things, drive him everywhere, plan the meals, set up the meds, turn the TV on and off or set it up so he can watch a movie. These are his things to be doing and now here I am doing them and I am sure not the right way or the way he was doing them.

Mama’s stroke took part of her memory. She’s physically able but mental slower but am hoping it can improve with time. It’s frustrating for her too  because she’s there all the time trying to help daddy and trying to let me have a bit of time for my family but still knowing she can’t remember how to wash the clothes or thread her sewing machine or the cats names. And the bills, WOW…it use to be daddy’s job, than hers but now mine and just plain WOW!!!! With nothing to fall back on it’s hard to make everyone happy with what little there is but everyone gets something so hopefully no nastigrams.

I know that in the future life won’t be like this because they won’t be here but you know what, I will take this life over what’s next because I can hug and bug and love and hate and everything a family does to make it all happen.

So my Mantra is “I’m here, in the now” and will just do the best with what I can and the Lord will just have to take care of the rest.

I hope this finds you all well, not having any extra things going on in your life but if there is, trust in the Lord….if he brings you to it, he’ll take you through it. Every day I rely on him. I do my best.

Blessings my friends!!!!

Monday, March 2, 2015

March 2nd, 1992….

Today is Mike’s birthday. My one and only, the sun in my shine. My pride and joy. I love this young man so much. Happy birthday Michael.

Mike 23rd birthday picture   IMG_20150205_110158721_HDR

Happy birthday Mike. I hope you have an awesome day, week, year! You deserve only the best. I love you!