reflection…and…

First because everyone wants to know how the dress reveal went….remember I told you Jim is not romantic, he’s not nostalgic, he’s not one for any compliments and he’s not one for really any support and even though I’d love to tell you he fell head over heals in love with me again, I’d love to tell you his tongue fell out of his mouth, I’d love to tell you he just stood there with his eyes pooping out of his head …. well it didn’t happen. His only comment was, your boobs are bigger then they were when I bought that dress for you. Nothing else. Did it hurt my feelings, no not really because after 32 years of being married to a man that knows how to say things not nice he didn’t say anything mean or unjust. He just didn’t say anything I would of love to hear. So for my next challenge I’m not doing anything to impress or ask for compliments, I’m just going to do it for me. 

Now to reflect on my 2011, it really was an awesome year. Now I didn’t lose tons of weight, only about 25 lbs total but I lost 3-4 dress sizes. I went from barely walking fast to running a 5K in 32 minutes. I went from lifting 5-10 lbs to anywhere’s from 25-110 lbs. I went from not being able to do a sit up to doing 30 semi vertical ones. I went from not a zip for push ups to 15 (not the girl kind either), planks I can do 5 at 45 seconds each. So I am happy with what my body can do and just think if I could of done that much in one year, what will this year bring?!  I do have tons to learn though, I can not keep a journal. As much as I would love to write everything down I just have the attention span of a knat and can maybe do a week or two. So for next year I want to learn to do this. Maybe I should just put a notebook out on the counter and write in that. I used myfitnesspal for a long time off and on and it is awesome but to sit down and either figure out my day foods and exercise or remember it at the end of my day just doesn’t always work. So something to really work on. I have gained self confidence that I didn’t even know I had. I left my house and applied for, trained for and tested for driving bus. I can do this and talk to people and meet people and not feel like a fat snow-woman. That’s what I use to think all the time, a snow-woman. Fat, ugly and not worth to much. Now I’m still not high on my list of worth much but I’m not at the bottom any more. I’m creeping up and feeling much better about me. I still have to give credit to Allan for a lot of that. He had faith in me long before I did. And my friends, Kim, Terri, Brenda…they are always in my corner and each in their own ways have helped me tons on my journey. My biggest fan is Mike, my son. No matter what day of the week it is he’s there to cheer me on. He’s come to all my races, he’s pushed me when I really didn’t want to go more, he’s helped me find out I can climb that wall, I can swim that river, I can run that race.

So for 2011, I did good. For 2012, I am going to do great. I am going to keep up what I’ve been doing with a bit more follow though, a bit more push to get to where I really want to be.

2012 is going to be a huge year. A year to have an empty nest, a year to turn 50, a year to learn to do much more on my own, a year to grow (or really shrink) and year to stretch and learn.

Thank you all for your help, for your support, for your ideas, your inspiration, for your errors for me to learn from, for my errors to maybe teach someone not to do that. Thank you for so much.

Take care my dear friends. Blessings to you all!!!