I’m not and I am as sad as can be. I am suppose to be visiting, touching, hugging, loving and spoiling him and here I am stuck in Minnesota because Wyoming is so far away and it takes so much money to get there and I don’t have it. Not even close. I don’t get to see Mike tell Christmas, do you know that is still so very far away?
Some e-mailed me the other day, of course not being nice, and said some rude and mean things about having an empty nest and complaining about. About getting a new job but not having money. About being on a weight loss journey and still being on it. It was a rude and mean letter and it hurt my feeling really bad. Right now my feelings are really crushable and he/she/it did it just fine. I’m telling you this why? I don’t know really, I suppose cuz I share with you and I’m betting whomever it was that sent me the letter will read this and do it again however it won’t get to be, they are blocked (I know, different address it can come).
My empty nest is hard for me and I am sure it will get easier some day but it hasn’t yet. But I can quit complaining about it, I suppose. My new job, it is a great new job. I live in the sticks and where this job pays good for here, for even 100 miles south it’s $10-15 less an hour. I have Mike’s student loan payment, house payment, insurance, gas, food, electric, and a stupid credit card and just like everyone else much more and stretching our little money is hard but saving is impossible. One day maybe, just not now. My diet, well I’m trying and learning and succeeding, just not quickly like some, very slowly I am getting to a healthy weight. My life isn’t easy but it sure isn’t bad, it’s just a struggle at times but I really don’t complain, I didn’t think so anyway.
This week my sister is feeling better, YEAH!!, This week my mom’s only sister had a bad heart attack but will be okay, Boo/Yeah!! Went to the cities on Thursday, took my mama and daddy to see her, YEAH!!! This week I had daycare for a day, oh how I have missed these kids, YEAH/Sad!! This week I subbed for the driver that had cancer, read had? It’s all gone, he’s going to be driving his bus and loving his kids for a long time still, YEAH!!! My grandma is in Florida…she’s 95 and got on a plane and is visiting family there, DOUBLE YEAH!!! My diet, I lost 6 lbs this week but only 5 of them count since one is another repeat pound, YEAH!!! Got a ways to go, BOO!!! Life is most awesome with some struggles along the way, YEAH!!! God didn’t say this would be easy but doable, I’m doing, YEAH!!!
This is my life, this may be at times not exactly what I had envisioned but you know what? It’s a great and awesome life and really I wouldn’t trade it for a million other lives. I am so proud of Mike, you know something else, He aced his finals, a 100% in diesel engines. He has perfect attendance and a 93% grade point average. I can see a bunch of companies wanting my boy in their businesses doing exactly what he wants to do. Close to home?, probably not but hopefully in this state or the surrounding ones but if someone thinks he’s great enough to want him far away, I will stand here giving him my blessings and being the most proud mama in the world because I did what I was suppose to do, his daddy and I did what we were suppose to do, we raised a wonderful, awesome, brilliant, and most handsome young man to follow his dreams. I can miss him, that’s my job. I can help when I can, I can hold when possible, I can be here when he needs me and I will survive, I just don’t have to smile inside every single moment of the day because I’m the mama and I love Mike with all my heart and soul.
Okay, that’s enough for today, I’m running out of kleenex this morning. Mean people stay away, nice people are welcomed. Any and all advise is welcomed and I so love reading what you all have been up too and have to say.
Take care my friends and have a most blessed weekend. My will be busy as usual. Please keep my family in your prayers, Cindy continues to need them, my aunt Pat needs the strength to heal and I will pray for each and everyone of you. Blessings my friend!