reflection…and…

First because everyone wants to know how the dress reveal went….remember I told you Jim is not romantic, he’s not nostalgic, he’s not one for any compliments and he’s not one for really any support and even though I’d love to tell you he fell head over heals in love with me again, I’d love to tell you his tongue fell out of his mouth, I’d love to tell you he just stood there with his eyes pooping out of his head …. well it didn’t happen. His only comment was, your boobs are bigger then they were when I bought that dress for you. Nothing else. Did it hurt my feelings, no not really because after 32 years of being married to a man that knows how to say things not nice he didn’t say anything mean or unjust. He just didn’t say anything I would of love to hear. So for my next challenge I’m not doing anything to impress or ask for compliments, I’m just going to do it for me. 

Now to reflect on my 2011, it really was an awesome year. Now I didn’t lose tons of weight, only about 25 lbs total but I lost 3-4 dress sizes. I went from barely walking fast to running a 5K in 32 minutes. I went from lifting 5-10 lbs to anywhere’s from 25-110 lbs. I went from not being able to do a sit up to doing 30 semi vertical ones. I went from not a zip for push ups to 15 (not the girl kind either), planks I can do 5 at 45 seconds each. So I am happy with what my body can do and just think if I could of done that much in one year, what will this year bring?!  I do have tons to learn though, I can not keep a journal. As much as I would love to write everything down I just have the attention span of a knat and can maybe do a week or two. So for next year I want to learn to do this. Maybe I should just put a notebook out on the counter and write in that. I used myfitnesspal for a long time off and on and it is awesome but to sit down and either figure out my day foods and exercise or remember it at the end of my day just doesn’t always work. So something to really work on. I have gained self confidence that I didn’t even know I had. I left my house and applied for, trained for and tested for driving bus. I can do this and talk to people and meet people and not feel like a fat snow-woman. That’s what I use to think all the time, a snow-woman. Fat, ugly and not worth to much. Now I’m still not high on my list of worth much but I’m not at the bottom any more. I’m creeping up and feeling much better about me. I still have to give credit to Allan for a lot of that. He had faith in me long before I did. And my friends, Kim, Terri, Brenda…they are always in my corner and each in their own ways have helped me tons on my journey. My biggest fan is Mike, my son. No matter what day of the week it is he’s there to cheer me on. He’s come to all my races, he’s pushed me when I really didn’t want to go more, he’s helped me find out I can climb that wall, I can swim that river, I can run that race.

So for 2011, I did good. For 2012, I am going to do great. I am going to keep up what I’ve been doing with a bit more follow though, a bit more push to get to where I really want to be.

2012 is going to be a huge year. A year to have an empty nest, a year to turn 50, a year to learn to do much more on my own, a year to grow (or really shrink) and year to stretch and learn.

Thank you all for your help, for your support, for your ideas, your inspiration, for your errors for me to learn from, for my errors to maybe teach someone not to do that. Thank you for so much.

Take care my dear friends. Blessings to you all!!!

Merry Christmas my friends….

May The Lord bless you and keep you.

May the Lord make his face to shine upon you, and be gracious to you.

May the Lord lift up his countenance upon you, and give you peace.

Merry Christmas my awesome friends. Blessings to you all!!

 

P.S. I am taking a little time off, I’ll be back before the New Year. Just taking some time for family and friends and me.

Christmas party…

Today was such a great day. We had our daycare Christmas party. The kids had a blast and I got a few super amazing gifts. I have to share this one the most. Rachel, Joss mama, is a quilter and she made me this. She made me cry because of it’s uniqueness and the love she put into it.

 

The kids also gave me a birdfeeder and seed, a heart necklace and a popcorn bowl and popcorn.

The kids enjoyed their goodies and had a blast watching each one open theirs.

 

Joss, Alex and Ron had to leave after our party so that just left Anton, Abby and Rachel and they wanted to watch a movie in my bedroom so I set them up with the Grinch and they enjoyed the quiet and dark.

It was a great day today and I so love all my little and not so little ones. These kids are why I make my other jobs work so that I can stay here and enjoy them.

I hope you all have a great Christmas. Take care my friends. MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Are you ready?

I am about as ready for this part of Christmas as I can be this year. I have all the daycare goodies taken care of. I have my families finished up and wrapped and I made my aunt these for her family. When we went to the cities on Saturday I wore my scarf that I had made and liked and Pat more then liked it, she loved it so I gave it to her and she wanted me to make 10 for her family. We went shopping for some supplies and between what we got together and what I had here I was able to make her 17 of them so she had some for gifts and some for herself. She received them yesterday and said she loves them all so a task well done.

 

This will be my last full week of driving  bus for now. The man I’m subbing for will be back on the 3rd so I’ll work on subbing for others and activities. I am on the list for a full time position and it can happen anywhere’s from now to a couple of years. I don’t mind because I really want to keep my daycare too so if I can just get enough runs in to help make a living I’m happy.

Life here has been busy. I always thought I was busy before but add driving bus 6+ hours a day on top of my other stuff, well now busy is an understatement. Of course it’s what keeps me going so I’m not about to complain any and next week will be a lazy week with just daycare and only 2-4 kids each day.

I haven’t even been to the gym since the 12th but will go on Saturday morning and next week when life is back to normal. I am sure I’m getting some of my cubby back. The scale says no but I can feel things are not as tight as they were and they weren’t that tight before. I’ve been working on ideas and thoughts on what I want to get down in 2012 but first I need to reflect on 2011 which really, truly was a great year. Like everyone it had it’s ups and downs but I am feeling pretty darn good about what I’ve been able to achieve. I’ll share my thoughts, ideas and what not some time next week.

Well I’m off in just a few minutes. Mike has been off part of this week (he got laid off last week) but goes to work tomorrow but it has been such a treat having him here. He’s been watching Joss for me and she just adores him.

I’ll try and be back soon. I am sorry I haven’t visited to much but like I’ve said before most of you come to my in-box so at least I am able to keep up on what’s going on. I’ll be better at supporting and commenting and so on when I find a few more hours in my day or at least when things slow down a bit.

Take care and have a blessed hump day. Only one day of school left for my kids and then our Christmas party. YEAH!!! Can’t wait to just spend time with my wee ones laughing, playing and enjoying them.

Blessings my friends.

Final update for our Christmas Dress Count Down Challenge…

WOW, time flies. I mean I started this challenge September 9th and it’s December 17th and today is my last day for this challenge. I succeeded on part of my challenge, I hung in there on a few things and I flunked one part. The part I flunked was the book. I had picked the Power of Now and I did read a good chunk of it but it was not quite right for me. I did learn to live in the moment and not to try and move ahead so fast and to enjoy the now and not before and later on. I did choose a different book for my health instead of mind and it really was a good one for teaching me more about leaving my 40’s and getting into my 50’s. My part of hanging in there was just sticking with 1200 calories or so a day and I’ve drank my gallon of water a day. The best part was I went from 185.2 and I dropped 11 lbs, today’s weight is 174.1. I did want another 10 lbs but that just can be part of my 2012 goal. My beginning size was a tight 14, today …. well you gotta see this…

 

Size 12, no stretch jeans. No muffin top, still breathing.

Now I have to admit the last two weeks I have had stress on top of stress and wasn’t positive I could finish the challenge let alone get into the much looked at dress. But I prove to myself that even though I can’t give 100% all the time that as long as I try my best and let the Lord do the rest I can do this. I can live my life, take care of myself and change into the woman I really want to be. I have a ways to go. I want to tone up, lose a bit more and keep up the good work that I’ve started. But I know that I can do this.

Now I know you really don’t want to see any more words. Like me this morning you want to see if I made it to my goal, to get into the red dress Jim bought me 32 years ago. A few months ago I tried it on and I couldn’t even get it zipped or over my body. Today this is what I got…

 

Now I had to take this pictures by myself because I didn’t want Mike or Jim to see it yet, so you don’t really get to see a whole bunch but you get to see that it is on. I am sure a bit more busty then I was back then and my arms sure aren’t the prettiness they once were but it’s on and even for a 32 year old dress on a 49 year old woman it’s not terrible. I can’t wait to share with Jim.

So I did it, I’m glad and I’m proud of myself. I’m not perfect but will never be but I can do what I set my mind too. I’m a slow learner, even slower loser but it’s happening. A bit more here and then and maybe one day I can really fit into this dress like it was made.

I’m off to read and see how you all finished up your challenge and also how your week went. Take care my friends. Have a blessed weekend.

Just a short sharing….

Today I let Joss paint. First I painted her and the she painted her craft, the table, her and more but she had a blast and her mama loved her projects. Here’s what she made today.

 

A handprint Christmas tree and bells made out of egg cartons. She loved the painting and it really was fun working with her. This is our first real craft. We’ve done other little things but nothing like this. I think she’s ready to make lots of different things. YEAH!!! I love a crafting little one.

I am hoping to find time tomorrow to try on my dress because I don’t want Jim to see me in it until Christmas so that means I can’t do it on the weekend. Maybe more sharing if possible.

Take care my friends and TGIF tomorrow. It’s been one of my most stressful weeks ever and I really could stand a short recess before a new week begins. Still got stuff happening this weekend but it’ll be nice to head to the cities see mama’s sister and visit and just maybe do a bit of bead shopping. A thrift store on the way home would be cool too. We’ll just see.

Blessings my friends!!

WOW!!! I’m sorry it’s been a few days…

Where to begin….Let’s do Saturday. Remember when I told you we were going to my dad’s to cut wood? Well we had 3 chainsaws and 5 workers getting his pile did and done. It took us 2 hours to get the 6 cords of wood cut, split and piled up but now I do not have to worry any more about daddy cutting up his wood and possible falling or worse.

I made lunch so that when everyone was done there was a huge salad and BBQ chicken wings (with homemade BBQ sauce with my homemade grape jam and chili sauce and lots of spices, daddy said it was the best). It was a great morning/afternoon to spend together as a family.

Then Saturday and Sunday Jim and I finished building this. Our new coal crib. This is where the wood use to be piled. It’s 6’ wide and 20’ long and we can pile the coal up 6’. The reason for doing this is to reinforce the walls because coal isn’t light.

Especially when Monday and Tuesday evenings we did this. By hand, shovel full by shovel full. We are looking for a elevator but haven’t found one yet. We want to get at least one more load in there before we start burning with coal, reason being we’d like to see just how much 4 tons to and how long it will last.

‘

Then on Monday I got a phone call from the bus garage. The man I’m going to sub for when I get my license was in the hospital could I please come in and do a ride along so that “if” I pass my test on Tuesday I could start driving right away. Talk about stress, it was enough stress just taking the test but now to know I have to pass because I have a job. My ride along when just fine. It’s my route, the one with my daycare kids on it, the ones with my family on it, the ones where if I didn’t know your kid, my kid knows you and now we all know each other. It was so cool the hugs and love I got when they saw me on the bus.

Tuesday morning started out bright and early (5am) doing my last ride along. So this way I had a once for morning and afternoon run. I took notes and watched the map so I wouldn’t forget something or someone. THEN…..Then the scary stuff happens. The test in Brainerd. A bigger town then mine by far but of course not as big as the cities but still plenty big for this first time girl. I drove over to Brainerd with a licensed driver and then he left to go out for breakfast while I faced the music. I was so scared I was shaking uncontrollably and my teeth were chattering so hard I couldn’t even talk. The test driver sent me back to the bus to calm down while he did the paperwork and then he came out. Before he came I just sat in the bus ready to puke and talked to the Lord. Told him I can’t do this without him helping me calm down and you know, almost like magic (not quite cuz it wasn’t gone but I could talk and breath and move again) I felt better. I managed to do very well, only one wrong and he only marked it off because I didn’t do the move but I did explain I had forgotten even before we moved. So now I am a bus driver. 

My first run last night was with my boss as my ride along and it went really well. I was late getting my wee ones home but it was very foggy and I did miss two stops so had to back up for 1 and turn around for the other. No one was complaining and all got home safe and sound. When I got home, after 12 hours away and in the bus we had to unload another load of coal. By 8:30 I was ready to cry and just drop dead. Which I did after a shower. Skipped dinner, in fact hadn’t even planned a dinner so not sure what anyone ate, didn’t really care. I did talk to boy of my men and told them I will need help at home know. Since I am gone first thing in the morning someone needs to feed the chickens and let them out and in the evening someone needs to put wood in the stove and shut up the chickens and collect the eggs. I will be using my crock pots lots. It helps I am home in 9:00 even though I still have daycare I am home to get caught up on things and also able to get supper going. I know that once I am use to this all will be fine but right now it’s difficult.

This morning I drove like a pro. I got to each stop on time, I remembered all the rules and regs and I got back home before my wee ones mama was here. All good. I leave now in an hour to get ready to do it all over again but at least when I get home there’s a chicken/rice hot dish in the crockpot and wild berry muffins for dessert. We have snow/rain most of today and it’s near freezing so not positive how the roads will be but I’ll be careful and get everyone home, hopefully in a reasonable amount of time.

Today is Wednesday and this week has flown by so fast. I don’t have much time for anything right now but I want you to know that I have most of your updates sent to my in-box so I am reading, I just haven’t had time to comment but I will catch up, just not sure when yet. This has not been the week for exercise other then building, shoveling and carrying wood and not quite sure where that will fit in right now but I’ll get that figured out one day. I don’t even know how long I’ll be driving 2 times a day because the sub is having gallbladder surgery and he’s 65+ years old so not sure how long it’ll take to heal. I am figuring through Christmas vacation and then after the first of the year we’ll see.

So there you have it my friends. Why I haven’t been around much and won’t be for a little bit more. My challenges end on Sunday and I’m just not sure about the dress yet and the Sweet Tooth Challenge, well I’m not perfect though I am watching what I’m eating. I had a cookie yesterday and frozen yogurt on Sunday. I’ll try and get my last update did and done this weekend. I am taking my mama and daddy to the cities to see mama’s sister and then to go out for a great dinner. But sometime in all this stuff I will take time to be with me and to get things taken care of. When ??? We’ll see.

Thank you all so much for your love and support. I so needed it and you were there, thank you!!! Now time to get the dishes done, the laundry out of the dryer, dry socks on and get my butt out the door as soon as Brenda comes. Take care my friends. Blessings to you all!!!

Quick...

I passed. One mistake. Already driving bus. 12 hour today plus came home and shoveled coal. Bed time. Will tell more after morning run.
Using itouch, not to good at it.
Take care and God Bless! Good night.

Almost done…2nd to last week of the CDCC…

Well I’m not going out with a bang like I had hoped too. I wanted really to lose these last 10 lbs but they are staying glued on. Maybe it’s muscle I’m building up, I don’t know I just know that the scale didn’t move this week it’s still sitting at 178.4. Now I also have my TOM so at least it didn’t go up. I have worked my a** off this week and I haven’t had anything super bad for me but I also haven’t had the rainbow of veggies and fruits I should but that also takes money so if it’s green, red I eat it, I can afford that. The other colored stuff costs an arm and leg and really I’d rather be warm so will put the money into the wood/coal and eat my salads with cubes and tomatoes. I did eat a mixed green salad this week. I usually just buy the ice-berg mix and add spinach to it but this week in our basket of goodies from Ruby Ministries we got a bin of mixed greens. Looks like dandelion greens in there and purple stuff and some really weird stuff but I ate it and it tasted awesome. There’s enough for at least another huge salad so guess what I’m eating for lunch today.

I haven’t been reading my book, I’m  back to the school bus manual so that I am prepared for Tuesday’s test. It’s hard to pick and chose at times but since I have got to pass this test it’s a bit more important then life style changes. Then I can get to driving bus and being able to afford a few more colors in the rainbow.

I have visited you all at least once this week but I’m sorry I haven’t been there more. Hopefully this weekend I can catch up a bit but no promise yet.

There’s only one week left guys. Are your outfits going to fit the way you want them too or like me you have a bit more work to do? I hope you all did stellar and one day so will I. Right now it’s enough for me to just make it day to day getting everything I have to get done. I will be putting on my dress for you all next week and showing you what I have done. It didn’t go on at all when I started this challenge so we’ll see just where it goes and how it fits. Christmas is still 2 weeks to go so my TOM will be over and maybe a couple more pounds can leave too before I surprise Jim with it Christmas morning. What do you think he’ll say…?…he’s not a man of many words, at least not the romantic or the compliment kind.

So there my friends is my update. Nothing stellar, in fact it’s been awhile since I’ve had a stellar week. I’m holding on, hanging in there, working at this and a snail could pass me up but I’m determined, I will be 50 this April and I WILL BE!!! I will be fit, happy and healthy, ready to hit the 2nd part of my life running. Literally running, that is one of my new years goals, to run. To be a real runner. I can do it, I know I can.

Take care everyone and have a blessed and super totally awesome weekend.

This week….Oh it’s long, sorry!

I have been terrible at posting and visiting and commenting, I’m sorry. I’ve made my rounds but not as much as I’d like to but it has been one of those weeks. I am normally a busy person anyways but this week topped it. Monday started off with exercising at 5 and that is a 4 day a week thing. Then I drove bus at 9:00 which took a few hours of training but my last training until I take my test Tuesday. Wednesday was house work, laundry and working out in the garage getting ready to move the wood, building a coal bin and more. Thursday I started working on the 4 cords of wood that needed moving. To give you an idea how much 4 cords of wood is, take your normal size bathroom and fill it from all to wall from floor to ceiling and that is about 4 cords of wood. That evening I helped start building the coal crib. Yesterday I finished the wood and last night we finished the east end of the coal bin and now today will bring home 4 tons of coal. In-between that of course is my daycare from 7am-6pm. Oh on Wednesday I took daddy to Christmas in the park for Christmas music, bon-fire and fireworks. I have pictures to share in just a few minutes. Last night I had mama and daddy over for dinner. We had lasagna, garlic bread, a huge mixed green salad and frozen yogurt, I try to at least once a week either fix them a meal or invited them over. It’s a great chance to just sit and visit. So you see why I haven’t had time to stop by and visit. I’ll try this weekend to take some extra time to visit you and see how you’re all doing. Other then spending the morning on Saturday cutting wood at my daddy’s I don’t think anything big is planned except of course finishing the coal crib and unloading by shovel the coal. We don’t have anything fancy like a dump box or conveyer so it’ll be one scoop at a time. At least it won’t just be me because we all are off this weekend. Oh I forgot to tell you, Wednesday after the Christmas in the park my suburban died. It wouldn’t start nothing. So I fiddled with it and finally got it running but it didn’t make it home. We got to the next town (after standing outside in a Minnesota's winter evening, it’s a good thing we know how to dress) and it died again. This time I called the mechanic and asked him what to do because I couldn’t come up with anymore fixes. He told me the catalytic convertor was plugged so try and take that off. Now remind you we are out in the street, it’s 9:30 at night and it’s not summer time. Plus this is Minnesota and they like to use lots and lots of salt on the roads so that means everything is rusted on. We did get the clamps off by breaking them off but that thing wouldn’t budge it was so rusted on there. So we let it cool down, the mechanic said it would lose it’s plug when it cools down though will come back once it’s hot again so we waited and then it started one last time and I drove home like a bat out of hell so that if it did die again at least we could coast a good distants. We made it within 2 miles of home and my uncle came and towed me the rest of the way home. I love my suburban’s but I have to tell you I wasn’t giving it any love that night. But it’s Friday night and I have to run to town and pick up the last of the lumber and pick up some cold medicine for Mike. Yep, he got my cold and is miserable but he’s working. Oh I almost forgot to tell you…guess the pictures have to wait a little longer…Mike got offered a temp for hire job. That means a normal everyday 8:00-4:30 M-F job. Of course being a temp it’s a 90 thing before they hire him outright but it’s a regular job. It’s at Crowwing County Recycling center and it’s nothing glamorous but it’s not behind a desk and the pay isn’t terrible. He’s mostly outside but can be in to warm up. This is not the garbage part of recycling it’s the metals. Cans, aluminum, copper, steel and that type of stuff. Not a permanent for the rest of his life job but one that he can start to get ahead with and also figure out what he might want later on in life. Also the place he was working at in McGregor offered him full time starting in March thru November so if this once isn’t perfect he has one he does love waiting for him. YEAH!!! Praise the Lord!!!

Okay I think I’m done, I’m sorry I was long winded today. I just had tons to share and also this blog is my memory book so I can look back and see what was what and when. I hope that you all have had a great week. That today is the best day ever and that you are all enjoying this holiday season. I’m starting to and today am bringing out the Christmas music. It’s time!!

Take care my friends and now see what our Christmas in the Park was like. Have a blessed and awesome day.

Thanks everyone for being patient with me. I’ll be by to visit soon. Blessings my friends!!!